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Life Anthony Church

On the 17 June 2020 I celebrated my 68th Birthday and it was also the 10th anniversary of my Mother's death and I got to reminiscing with my family about some of the things my Mother taught me and the hilarious things she used to say to us.

My mother taught me to APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE , "If you must kill your brother, do it outside, I just finished cleaning the house"

My mother taught me RELIGION, "You better pray that mess will come out of the carpet"

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL, "If you don't stop playing up, I am going to knock you into next week!"

My mother taught me LOGIC, "Because I said so , that's why"

My mother taught me MORE LOGIC, "If you fall out of that tree and break your leg, don't come running to me"

My mother taught me FORESIGHT, "Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you have an accident"

My mother taught me IRONY, "If you keep crying, I will give you something to cry about"

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS, "Keep your mouth shut and eat your dinner"

My Mother taught me about CONTORTIONSM, "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!?

My mother taught me about STAMINA, "You will sit there until you have eaten all of the greens on your plate"

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Dave - The Quiet One!!
Dave - The Quiet One!!

Reading that I can visualise my own late Mother saying the same things. I am sure I have no doubt come out with the odd similar saying over the years to my own son!


Anthony - reading your mother's logic I see she was obviously a fan of Dave Allen. Probably would be considered as non P.C. nowadays but I always enjoyed his humour!

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